A passer-by noticed an old lady sitting on her front step.

  "I couldn't help noticing how happy you look! What is your secret
for such a long, happy life?"

"I smoke 4 packs of cigarettes a day", she said. "Before I go to bed, I smoke a nice big joint.  Apart from that, I drink a whole bottle of Jack Daniels every week, and eat only junk food.  On weekends I pop a huge number of pills and do no exercise at all."

 "This is absolutely amazing at your age!!!!", says the passer-by. "How old are you?" "Twenty four", says the lady.